Hi, I’m Sarah Tjing - Trauma-informed Parent Coach, Yoga Teacher and Mother of two boys. I help parents strengthen their capacity to parent through science-based research & spirituality.
Science-based research: progressing towards a secure attachment with their child and within themselves using research-backed approaches.
Spirituality: applying yoga teachings to release the weight parents place on themselves.
My personal experience with parenting has felt like hiking on unsteady terrain, barefoot. If you’re feeling disheartened, stranded and that nobody understands what you’re experiencing…I do. I know what it’s like to feel conflicted about how I want to parent and what society tells me about how I should parent, whether it’s sleep or discipline related. I know what it’s like to feel helpless and ashamed when parenting wasn’t as seamless for me as it was for others. I know how hard it is to experience degrees of anger and aggression from a highly sensitive, high needs child who hardly slept - as a highly sensitive parent with a disorganised attachment, desperate to get it ‘right’.
I was parenting from so much fear - fear of not being in control, fear of not knowing when certain struggles would end, fear of the damage I was doing to my kids, fear of being hated and rejected by them one day, fear of not showing up as the mother they need, fear of repeating unhealthy patterns…the list goes on. I know the incessant self-blame for anything that goes ‘wrong’. The paradox of feeling so much love and resentment at the same time.
Before becoming a mother, I thought I’d done the emotional prep needed for the lifelong marathon of parenting. I’ve been a yoga teacher for nearly a decade, with a regular physical practice, a knowing of my triggers and multiple mindfulness tools under my belt. I still managed to fall apart, because motherhood has a way of awakening wounds that have laid dormant and amplifying the hurt that much more.
Amongst the sea of attempts to ‘fix’ my struggles (including countless parenting books, podcasts, parenting courses & specialist appointments), the life-saving relief came from having someone truly listen and emphathise with my pain, fears, sadness, grief, anger, perceived truths, and everything in between.
They say ‘let your mess be your message’ and this has set the path of what I’m called to do. I have consistently returned to these science-based and spiritual concepts to guide my thoughts, words and actions. As we always say in yoga, progress over perfection. The subtle but powerful shifts are what create expansive and lasting changes, because this is a consistent and intuitive way of parenting that will be cemented as your children grow, regardless of their ages or circumstances.
The hope
Parents who find me are seeking to grow and to better understand themselves - why they do the things they do, why certain things trigger them and what beliefs their thoughts have generated. They yearn to sail through parenting with less conflict, less frustration, less isolation; and more closeness, more joyfulness, more connection. They long to embrace and enjoy this long-lasting, but also short-lived, season of our lives…to be in each moment long enough to make it a lifetime memory, instead of dissociating, suppressing and withdrawing in order to cope.
My intent is to edge you closer to your wish. To make you feel less alone, to remind you that you are not a defective human being and neither is your child, to support you in taking deliberate steps towards self-compassion, forgiveness and acceptance.
You do enough, you have enough and you are enough.
I’m here, to soften your shame, and ease your expectations.
I’m based in Perth - Western Australia, serving parents + caregivers worldwide.